What should be considered as forgiving factors when trying to work past infidelity and save a marriage?
April 8th, 2011 by
Question by Starla: What should be considered as forgiving factors when trying to work past infidelity and save a marriage?
Lots of famous and regular spouses are cheating. What should the spouse that’s been cheated on do? What determines if the marriage is over of worth another try?
What should be seriously considered if you want to save marriage. What would the cheating spouse have to do/say to get another chance at repairing marriage?
Best answer:
Answer by Lyar
I have never known a couple where one spouse was caught cheating who didn’t do it again. Unless you’re prepared to forgive and forgive and forgive I vote divorce. This is only coming from my experience of what I see my friends and family do though.
What do you think? Answer below!
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It depends on the people involved, sometimes a marriage can be healed but the cheater has to call every person he cheated with in front of the spouse and tell each person that they are back with the wife.husband and they are no longer going to see each other. It is up to the cheated to [rove himself and his sincerity. The one who was cheated on needs to figure out if this person is being sincere and if they have the energy or the want to continue with the relationship.
I don’t think you can ever really work past it. It will always be a shadow over the marriage, and there will always be doubt and mistrust on the part of the person who was cheated on.
I was seperated for 2.5 years, within that time my ex has said a few times he wanted to come back and work things out. the most recent time he sounded sincere so I slowly tried to start things back up again. It was going good for about 1 month then the shady behavior started back up so I gave up. Not willing to go through that pain again. Once someone ruins trust it’s very hard to get it back if ever.
If you really want to save the marriage, go to marriage counseling. It will take time to build trust in the relationship. The one who cheated, if they are remorseful and want to work on repairing the marriage, then they should do what it takes to make the partner comfortable. The one cheated on should in time, with therapy, should begin to feel they can trust their partner again over time. This is only successful if the both of you are willing to work on this.
well if you were in love with the person in the first place you wouldnt cheat i dont care what anybody says its true. once a cheater always a cheater.
All that is really up to the couple and how much they value the relationship and if the one thats been cheated on can forgive, make changes so it won’t happen again and trust the cheater again.
Or learn to live with infidelity
I think a person can forgive but you’ll never forget. Something or someone will say something and it will make you remember what they’ve done. You have two choices deal with it or don’t……..
First and foremost, if it was infidelity that means they stopped themselves before it got to adultery.
Something to be said for that.
Otherwise it’s up to the wronged spouse to decide.
If the cheating spouse isn’t remorseful and if the cheated-on spouse cannot find their fault in the way things went awry and fix things then it’ll just happen again.
Infidelity does not happen in isolation – typically both spouses are straying just one is more “successful” than the other.
A confession should count for something; that means they ended things on their own and didn’t wait until they were caught.
You never forget but it does get to a point where it feels like it was a life-time ago. Getting even also helps.